Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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