I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
