how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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