I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
