She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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