Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
