I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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