And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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