did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
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