Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
