I hate all girls vehemently.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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