The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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