You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
