you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
