..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
