idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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