I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
