before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
