i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Houston, we have a blender
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
