Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
