Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
