It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
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