ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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