I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Holy shit dude........stairs
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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