you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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