the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
you had me at cake vodka
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Randomize
