the condom got lost in my hair
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
