you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
