just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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