Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Randomize
