no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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