How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
