Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
