hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
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You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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