wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
