i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
They took my balls.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
