ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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