i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize
