the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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