why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
