Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
