I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
