well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
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