i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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