sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Randomize