I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
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