You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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