Come see our sink grown plant.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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