I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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