i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize